I want you to know
Where I go ahead and finally stop a step
When I appear but also disappear

I hate myself when digging my own sadness back into you
Letting my heart hurts and shattered
I am a broken human with this complicated story

So when I tell you I missed you
I do miss you
And when I tell you I loved you
I do love you
But when I tell you I hated you
I really hate you

I really hate you for being around my mind
I really hate you until I hate myself
With all these uncertainties
My heart aches as much as you did


Malang, 2018